JACK’s story

I grew up in church my whole life. I was there every time the doors were open, three or four times a week, but I wasn’t actually a Christ-follower until two years ago. I had been baptized when I was young, and was serving in the church, leading small groups, even serving on staff, but it was all an act. My concern, my focus was always on myself, and living up to a reputation that was equal parts thrust upon me and created by me to prop myself up and make me look good. My “obedience” wasn’t true obedience, it didn’t stem from a desire or love for God, it was all about me.

Then, a couple years ago, the Summer after I graduated high school, that all changed when the Lord finally brought me to the end of myself; I began to follow Him like He prescribed in Mark chapter 8:34, denying myself, taking up my cross, and following HIM – not myself or my own desires – following HIM daily. But even then, a bunch of pride still remained – even though I was genuinely following Him and learning to love His way over my own, I was still partially-focused on my own reputation.

I was on staff and on stage every week, and it felt like I couldn’t be too honest with most of the church body; even though there was an inward change that my closest friends and mentors knew about, nobody else in the church at large knew what was going on underneath my carefully-tailored exterior. So, because of my concern for my own reputation, and the fact that I didn’t want to let anybody know that I hadn’t been a Christian for so long before this time, I never publicly professed the Lord’s work in my heart after my actual conversion.

However, the Spirit has been nudging me this way ever since I first surrendered; every time [my church] had a baptism Sunday I felt like I should go, but never did. Finally, in talking about baptism and obedience the Spirit granted me the humility to finally lay down my prideful obsession with being the ‘perfect church kid’ and just following in obedience, something I should’ve done a long time ago.

I believe that Jesus Christ, the Holy Son of God, came and lived a perfect and sinless life, died in my place as the Perfect Sacrificial Lamb, paying a debt I never could, and then rose to life on the 3rd day conquering death and sin. I have placed my faith in Him, and though I’m still far from perfect, by His grace I follow Him now and seek to obey Him in humility each and every day. My life is not about myself, not about my reputation, and not about doing things my way – it’s all about Him. This I proclaim to you now.