Ryan’s Story

I grew up in a religious home, and though we were at church every time the doors opened, we attended churches whose theology was inadequate to teach the entirety of the gospel. At a young age, I made a profession of faith that I remember being based on the fear of what would happen if I didn't. And from that young age until my early adulthood, I would spend myself trying to earn the salvation which I professed, which left me empty and hopeless. I was taught very early that I needed to earn God's forgiveness, and in turn, my righteousness, and consequently, every failure I made, required me to throw myself upon His mercy once again and beg him to "resave" me. This was exhausting and impossible to maintain.

Towards the end of high school, by the encouragement of a youth leader at church, I began to read scripture for myself and I began to see my state as a sinner, Christ's death as my substitute, and my need for his righteousness. While I had a sincere desire to live for Him, I still felt the need to earn something from God or be good enough for Him.

It wasn't until my twenties that the Lord graciously taught me the truth of John 10:28 where Jesus says of His true sheep, "I give them eternal life and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand." Verses such as this, really the whole book of John, Acts, Romans 9, Ephesians 2, and many more, spoke such reassuring truth to my soul. When he opened my eyes to this truth, I felt as though a burden was lifted from my shoulders and He gave me a peace I never knew I could have. The assurance of my salvation and the knowledge of his sovereignty was such a freeing truth.